...beneath these tragic waves
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revenge of wintergreen girl
Feb 09, 2001

Wintergreen Girl, who I mentioned very briefly before, has been a snowballing pebble in my shoe for a while now. At first it wasn't too terrible. She prattled on endlessly about things which I have zero interest in, such as drugs, vampires (welcome to being an adult), tampons, and her boyfriend. I've handled far worse than that in my day though, so I've delt with it. I try to keep it at the point where I avoid conversation with her if at all possible, but just under the amount it would take me to seem like an ass. And when I talk to her, I'm nice and all that. I just simply don't want to talk is if she can't find a decent topic (and let me tell you, I'm easy to entertain).

Her favorite topic it seems, is how freakin' awesome she is. Indirect hints at that most of the time but day by day she gets closer to saying "I'm a god!" In fact, she has one of those "Goddess" stickers on her car. When I saw it as I was walking to my car, she said to me "true isn't it?" Had to get my tongue operated on after that little incident. Because I bit it off, you might think. That indeed would have been the cause had my tongue not first exploded because it was tripping over itself soooo much, trying to say fifty things at once.

Often times when sitting in class, I'll hear her when I snap out of my design world for a moment. Being the Master of Graphic Design, as she evidently is, I can normally hear here saying (supposedly to herself, but I know better) how "wicked" her newest picture is. She throws various comments out and from the corner of my eye I see her constantly looking in my direction to see if my interested was peaked and had turned to see her masterful work. When she finally catches on that the trick won't work on me, she just flat out tells me to look.
"I bet you're wondering what I'm talking about"... bold. Then I look just so she'll stop playing her game.
"Pretty cool isn't it?" She had put a bear head on a picture of her brother. THAT'S RIGHT! A bear head on a picture of her brother?! Wow! She even figured out how to make it the desktop background! And she'll go on and on about how smooth her background is (and how she can make this voice programs on the computers say profane words...oooo) to the point where I want to thrust my fingers into the ample amount of lightsockets around the room while pouring gallons of water all over my body (sounds like a Faces of Death calender doesn't it?)! And perhaps down a bottle of poison for good measure. Now mind you, I'm no Picasso of the digital design world (and I don't rival 'many others' for the specific one person who might be wondering such), but I'm no longer impressed by (badly) putting a bear head on a human's body (assuming we are still speaking of design and not genetics). At first I tried to cheer her on, hopefully getting her to improve but 1) she does the SAME thing everyday, as if she doesn't know how to save and therefore not learning...you'd think by now she could put a MEAN bear head on a MEAN man's body, very meanly. But no. 2) she's very cocky about it. I understand being proud of things you do, but she hits that mile mark and keeps on running. I might sound impatient about the whole situation, but I'm not really. As patient as I can be, her getting on my nerves should drive the point about her problems home. Despite being driven rapidly insane, I do give her praise so she'll keep practicing.

She asked me one time for advice on her design by saying "Do you think it's too crowded?" I took a moment to look at it and decide what I thought and she looked at me and said, dead serious, "you do know what I mean by crowded, right?" $%^!$#.

She has other problems but I won't get into them if I can help it. Don't get me started on how she sometimes puts a CD in the computer and starts dancing, worse than me (somehow). She does the move where her head bobs to the right, eyes close, and her hands pops up in a "talk to the hand" type manner while she sings (loudly) to the music. Normally she asks if the music will be a bother to me, and I tell her to go ahead because she sometimes has something good on the CD's. Had I known she'd be singing along, however, I'd have to tell her like it is; it bugs the crap out of me. And then I'll tell her if she'll be quiet I won't mind =)

Now to the whole point of this entry, which wasn't all the other crap I just wrote, but the crap I'm about to write. Something that happened today that defied even the normal boldness of Wintergreen Girl. I was sitting in my own world, doing my thing, when she walked in laughing to herself. Sat down, laughed again. She did her "do something, look at me to see if I took note, do it again until I look at her" game. When yet again I didn't bite that hook, she spoke.
"I'm pretty mean." Here we go, I thought. "I shouldn't have done that." She looks at me...waits...looks...
"I'm so mean *giggle*" she declares, all in my face, so even I can't ignore her (and I can ignore like nobody's business).
"Why are you mean...?", I inquire.
"I made a guy run into a wall," she replied. I knew right then where she was going, but I let her tell it. "I guess he got...distracted," she giggled in a way that said, "God I'm hot and everyone wants me...including you!"
"Ah," I say, making it obvious I both don't believe her and am not interested (in her nor her likely made up story).
"Sad thing is," she continues, "I just rolled out of bed." Let me tell you people, if anyone knows she just rolled out of bed, it's me, because I have eyes. You know, those things that are burning in my skull like the tortured souls of the damned.

The main reason I really don't like her and was forced to write this about her (and hopefully you'll now agree with my opinion and not just think I'm a jerk) was her final statement.
"This is great, I'm going to use [this event] to make my boyfriend jealous." It was all I could do to hold back the profanities that were about to flow from my mouth like milk flows in Oklahoma. I've heard her say numerous times how sweet this guy is and how he does everything in the world for her. And allow me to say, she should be thankful because she's no supermodel or anywhere close. Yet here she was, about to try and make him feel like crap because she obviously is an ass. More proof nice guys always get shredded. Lucky for me I think this rant will promptly boot me from the 'nice guy' category.

Anyway, I'm not really one to judge, I'm aware. To women, I might be the exact kind of person Wintergreen Girl is (a prick, repulsive, etc...but male, obviously...at least, I hope) but how I pray that's not so. If I am though, I wish I could be as unjustifiably cocky as she.

I'd go in to the stuff she mentioned about how she was going to scan in her "naughty" photos she had in the car (and I could see if I wanted!), but I just ate (2 days ago). Naughty indeed. Perhaps she said that because she wished to be "punished". Ironically, the only one who was likely punished was the photographer, as he no doubt had to look through the viewfinder at least once. Oh yes, and the camera. The poor, poor camera. And whoever developed the film. Apparently, the list goes on and on (not unlike her chattering).


"so no longer will I lay down, play dead
play this beat down, gun shy martyr
pitiful I rose, I roared
I will, I am"

devolve | evolve

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